15 Hilarious Sleep-Deprived Stories from Breastfeeding Moms

November 22, 2017

If there’s one thing everyone agrees on about being a new mom – it’s that you won’t get much sleep. Between nursing and pumping, changing diapers, and worrying about every little sound (or lack of sound) your baby makes, there’s not much time for getting in a solid four hours, let alone eight!

It can be a chaotic and challenging time that leaves most new parents feeling totally sleep deprived. And when you’re sleep deprived, hilarious things start to happen. These are 15 of our favorite sleep-deprived stories from real moms.

  1. My husband was changing our daughters diaper around 3 a.m. I went to sit down on the glider and pulled my pants down as if going to the bathroom instead of lifting my shirt to feed her.
    – Anna W.P.
  2. Attempted to breastfeed a pillow. Started to freak out when I couldn’t find the head to latch on.
    – Aurelie G.
  3. I put baking soda in my coffee instead of sugar. Watched it volcano all over the counter. Thought to myself, well that’s weird sugar. Then I added creamer and tried to drink it anyway and just cried. 😭😂
    – Kayla D.
  4. It was one of the first nights home from the hospital. I was so out of it. I couldn’t figure out why she wasn’t latching. I snapped out of it and realized that I was trying to feed her feet. The funniest part is that when I saw her feet, it scared me because my brain told me that her face turned into feet.
    – Chalndler H.
  5. Watched my train arrive on the platform, and I just stood there as the doors opened, people got on, and it left 😂…without me.
    – Sandra B.I.
  6. Tried to unlock the front door to my house with my key fob for my car. Standing there clicking the unlock button for 5 minutes wondering why my door won’t unlock. 😂😂
    – Erica C.
  7. I wanted to cook an eggroll in the microwave, and I swear the box said to cook for 11- 12 minutes. It really said 1 1/2 minutes. That thing was black as charcoal and smoked up the house when it was done cooking LOL … AND I was still hungry after, and I just wanted to cry.
    – Mindy A.O.
  8. I tried to tell my husband that I needed something to eat and that I also needed to feed the baby. It came out, “I need to eat the baby.”
    – Sarah G.
  9. I grumpily asked my husband where the baby was…while I was nursing her. He asked, “are you serious?” And it took me a minute to figure out why he wasn’t answering me.
    – Heather L.
  10. I came home from the hospital with a C-section, was coming down with a sore throat, went in the bathroom and sprayed perfume in my mouth instead of throat spray. That woke me up very quickly!
    – Jennifer F.
  11. I was pumping while my newborn was napping, and was so tired that I was pumping into a bottle on one side and on the other side I was pumping all over myself. It took me a few minutes to realize I was dripping milk all over myself because only one bottle was connected. The other one was still on the kitchen counter. To this day my husband and I laugh about it, but at that moment I was crying over spilled milk. LOL, now I make sure that my pump parts are all put on. I won’t make that mistake again. 🙂
    – Nicole P.
  12. I was trying to feed one of my 2-week-old twins who was refusing to latch and screaming. I remember thinking that they don’t like my milk because it doesn’t taste like pizza. 🍕
    – Renee F.
  13. I was power pumping one early 3 a.m. morning. My zombie-self poured 2 ounces I had just moments ago pumped down the drain. I was already on to the next step – in bottle cleaning and sterilizing mode. I was looking for the milk all over the kitchen…. That night I cried over milk down the drain.
    – Monique L.
  14. Rocked my dog’s head to sleep thinking it was my whimpering newborn. Don’t know how long I held my dog’s head in my hands until my newborn was flat out screaming in hunger in her bassinet next to my bed. 😳
    – Melanie D.
  15. Got to work one morning. At the top of the stairs decided to use the restroom before going into the office. Finished my business then walked right back downstairs and back in my car. Was just about to turn the key before I remembered that I hadn’t actually gone to work.
    – Chandra C.

Do you have a hilarious sleep-deprived story? Share in the comments below.

8 thoughts on “15 Hilarious Sleep-Deprived Stories from Breastfeeding Moms

  1. When my oldest was 1 month old my mother in law told me a story of how when my husband was a baby and she was nursing him she had a sleep deprivation dream (when you are half awake but start to dream) that there was a spider biting her breast so she smacked it off her, who she really smacked was my baby husband who then landed on his dad (she nursed in bed so he landed on a soft surface). I thought it was silly and laughed at the story. That night as I fed my daughter I had a sleep deprivation dream that there was a fly walking on my breast so I freaked out and smacked it…the IT I smacked was my daughter’s hand 😰😓

  2. I was so exhausted from 2 nights in a row of not sleeping, that one night my 2 week old daughter woke up screaming demanding to be fed. And instead of feeding her right away, I just looked at her and started poking her trying to turn her off. I thought she was my alarm going off for the day.🙃⏰

  3. The other day I made a hurried trip to the bathroom to go pee between my sons growth spurt cluster feedings and when I was done I stood up, pulled my pants up, and the proceeded to unroll the toilet paper like a cat rather than wash my hands. The worst part was when my brain caught the mistake I realized I now had to reroll the dang thing.

  4. I would warm baby wipes under my boobs while my husband changed the baby. Once, I discovered one under a boob days later. It was as dry as a dryer sheet!

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